When we entered 2021 the idea of moving was not on our radar. In fact, we had been given the opportunity to extend our contract here in Spain, we were going to be able to stay! We were thrilled. This is home to us. This is the country we love, this is where our kids go to school, we have amazing friends here, our church is here, the list goes on and on. Then, on April 28th, we got a phone call that knocked the wind out of us and left Trenton and I staring at each other blankley. The call went a little like “It is impossible to extend your contact here in Madrid.” The words just wouldn’t come to either of us. We were (and honestly still a bit are) devastated.
That night I didn’t sleep. I was up at 1:00 in the morning wide awake, quite literally a million thoughts running through my mind. I truly felt like a hamster on a hamster wheel (a very overwhelmed hamster). All I could think was we don’t own any cars in the US, we don’t have a house, where is a good school, all our appliances here will have to be sold along with furniture and TVs, how will the kids take the news, I’m going to miss our church, etc. As I layed there with these and so many more thoughts I prayed “I need some peace right now in my heart, Jesus will you pour your peace out over me right now?” I continued to lay there for another hour with no luck of sleep. So I did what most other people do when they accept rest is out of the picture, I grabbed my phone and started scrolling Instagram. A pastor that I follow had just posted part of the 63rd Psalm. So I opened my Bible app to read it in its entirety. I found such comfort as I read, when I reached the 6th verse I knew the Lord was speaking directly to my heart. It reads: “6 I lie awake thinking of you, meditating on you through the night. 7 Because you are my helper, I sing for joy in the shadow of your wings. 8 I cling to you; your strong right hand holds me securely.” My heart was full of peace, and I was thankful for it. It was at this point I knew sleep would come. I closed my eyes and the next thing I knew I was waking up to my 5:45 alarm. I got up like I do every day, before my kids so I can have my coffee and read my Bible in the stillness of the morning. I said a quick prayer that the Lord would speak to me through his word. I opened my chronological Bible to April 29 and began to read. I was reading about when King David was being chased by Absolom. I couldn’t help but think how he must have been struggling with this. His own son trying to kill him and take the throne for himself. I knew David must have been devastated, and I could relate that morning. Though I am sure my devastation was nothing compared to what he must have been dealing with at that moment, I took comfort in knowing God was faithful to David, and he would be faithful to me as well. I turned the page to continue that days reading and there it was. The 63rd Psalm. Tears welled up in my eyes. I knew I was seen and cared for by God. I couldn’t help but think that when He was with David as he wrote that Psalm, He had my heart and circumstance on His mind. He knew this very Psalm would be used to comfort me thousands of years later. To speak beautiful truth over my life. To sing promises over me. And while there was still sadness in the circumstance, there was perfect peace in the plan. This was not our plan, but it is God’s. And I have comfort knowing his plans for my life always far exceed my own expectations.
I will answer some of the more common questions people are asking us:
- How are the kids taking the news? They were both shocked when we told them. Jane says she is both happy and sad about it. She said she is going to miss her friends and school so much. To be honest The states is a foreign country to her. She doesn’t remember much about it. She was 5 when we came here. Owen is taking the news a bit rougher. Which we anticipated. He doesn’t want to go. He loves every aspect of Spain, as do we. I know in time he will find things he likes about our new location, but right now he is feeling sad and that’s ok. We are encouraging him to remember how faithful God was when we moved here and how we know he will be that faithful again when we leave.
- Where are we moving to? We are relocating to The Woodlands, Texas, just north of Houston. Trenton’s company has an office there. He will still be working for the Madrid, Spain office, doing the same job he is doing now, and reporting to his same bosses. We will just be based out of the US.
- Why are we leaving Spain? Red tape. Fine print. Government particularities. None of which anybody saw coming. This was not only a shock to us but also to Trenton’s bosses. And the office here as a whole. (It’s kind of a lot to dive into, but if you’re interested in hearing the details message me).
- What does the future look like for us? We aren’t sure. We love being international. Our kids have thrived while being abroad and so have we. We are hoping that Houston will be a temporary location for us and that another position overseas, in a different country, will become available soon ish. (We cannot come back to Spain due to tax status stuff). There are a million different outcomes at this point. We aren’t the ones who know the future, but we know the one who does.
If you all would be please be so kind as to pray for us as we transition. A move overseas is a HUGE undertaking. A move overseas with very little notice feels overwhelming. Currently we own zero cars, no house, and have no furniture stateside. Many things we have here in Spain will need to be sold or donated as they are too large to fit in the shipping crate or do not comply with American electricity. And while all of that can be complicated, the real struggle to us is how we will feel coming back to America. America was the place of our birth, the country on our passports, but at this point it isn’t home to us anymore. We aren’t sure where we fit in. Please be gracious with us as we transition. Please be patient with our kids if you say to them “doesn’t it feel good to be home” and they look at you confused.
While this is not the adventure we desired, Trenton and I are pretty good at shifting our dreams and moving forward hand in hand. We are packing and going through the house at a crazy pace. And looking to the future with a sense of determination. Our current circumstance does not determine our joyfulness or thankfulness. Our hearts are overcome with joy and thanksgiving from our time here in Madrid. The memories we made, the friendships we formed, the ministry opportunities we had, the personal growth we experienced. Our lives will forever be divided into two parts, before Spain and after. We are not returning to the US the same people we left as. And I am glad. There aren’t enough words to sum up our experience here, but I will leave with this.
Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen. -Ephesians 3:20-21
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